Chen Zhicai, Keith -->No.4. . Born on the date of 3rd Jan 1987
Currently studying in Serangoon Junior College
Live @ Hougang, Singapore
Addicted to playing soccer and computer games, listening to chinese pop songs and daydreaming
Principle in life is to do the best in everything. . never give up without giving his best shot. . =D
Still Friends
The day kicked off with A level chinese paper. . Not exactly a tough paper . . I maybe bluffing myself. . . Think i should be able to get at least a B4 for the subject. . A bit too over confident huh. . ?
Well. . Made an important decision today. . Maybe i should say i finally picked up the courage to really listen to what my heart really wanted to say. . Don't know how or why, i managed to wake up my senses, think and considered carefully before making the decision. .
It was supposed to be our first official date. . I turned up as promised and went out with her to Suntec. . . to catch the movie. . Before it. . Brought her to Esplanade Park, and i was supposed to propose to her to be my girlfriend. . But i did not. . Instead. . I back out last minute. .
Somehow and somewhat, i felt i can't do that. . Repeating the questions she had asked me many times during our previous conversation in my mind . . Is she really the right person for me. . Do i really have feelings for her. . I have been avoiding these questions in the previous few occasions, putting it off by telling her that 'i do not know how to answer'. . But this time, i plucked up the courage to face them . . . I wasn't really sure. . Yet i thought i was willing to try. . She's so nice to me maybe we can give a chance to each other?. . But try. . ? No. .! I felt i can't do that. . She could end up getting hurt because of this. . of my selfishness. . Finally. . I told her all these which maybe . .she didn't expect. . I told her "let's not start for the time being. ."
I was glad i could have her understanding. .
She told me she was having the same feelings but didn't dare to tell me. .
We came to a mutual agreement that we will still remains as friends . . at least for now. . Maybe we should give ourselves more time to really understand each other more and the feelings we have towards one another. . This will be better compared to ending up miserably and hurting her feelings as we have seemed from many other couples. . Love is something bestowed by the God to make us happier. . Not bring us sadness. . Anyway. . She deserve someone who really love her totally and can make her very happy. .
I know i am rather a basket in backing out at the last minute. . And i don't know whether had i did the correct thing. . But most importantly, i don't want to risk causing her any sadness if the relationship don't turns up well. . I am really touch and grateful to have her understanding. . And it was eventually, a happy ending for two of us. .
We went for the movie as planned. . Watched The Doll Master, a Korean horror movie which is about some dolls coming alive to take revenge on the descendents of the killers of a wrongfully murdered man who was accused of killing his own wife. . Not a bad movie to watch except that it can get slightly boring at times. .
simply written on 4:46 AM
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